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Be careful of the presents you exchange

Fadzayi Maposa Correspondent

The festive season is upon us!

As you walk through the supermarkets adorned with decorations, it is hard not to feel nostalgic about past celebrations.

Many people dedicate themselves to selecting the perfect gifts for their loved ones each year, meticulously checking off names from their lists and eagerly awaiting the moment of exchange.

Reflecting on gift-giving traditions

Let us delve into the topic of presents while we still have a fortnight to prepare. Growing up, adults in our community emphasised fairness in gift-giving. I recall a method where everyone’s names were written on pieces of paper, folded, and placed in a hat.

Each person would draw a name and purchase a gift for that individual. This often led to mixed reactions—some smiles, but also scowls, particularly when the recipient did not appreciate the gift.

Surprises have never been my favourite. For instance, when my family tried to spring a surprise birthday cake on me, they ended up surprised themselves—I had already bought my own cake!

I cherish presents and hold the belief that it is the thought that counts, but I refine that to mean the thought must truly resonate.

The importance of meaningful gifts

Receiving gifts that lack meaning can be disheartening. In school, well-meaning adults often matched us with presents from people who hardly knew us, resulting in gifts I did not like. However, I have learned that communicating my preferences leads to more thoughtful gifts. If I receive something unappreciated, I simply pass it on to someone who will value it.

It is essential for both the giver and receiver to have open conversations about preferences. While some may try to use gifts to teach lessons—like suggesting every woman needs a wig—I have never felt limited by my short hair.

Navigating emotional complexities

The festive season can stir a mix of emotions. It is crucial to remember that if someone gives you a gift, you are not obligated to reciprocate immediately.

If you had already planned a gift for them, that is great, but do not feel pressured to buy something on the spot. A polite apology for not having a gift ready can go a long way, and you can always plan to give them something later.

Gifts of intimacy: a caution

Some individuals may choose to give or receive sexual intimacy as a gift during this season. If this is not something you desire, it is vital to communicate openly with your partner.

The festive atmosphere can sometimes lead to pressured decisions, and it is important to ensure that such gifts are consensual and well-prepared. Remember, thoughtful gifting also involves considering health and safety.

Do not allow the festive lights to confuse you. Some presents have many ribbons attached. Remember while the thought counts, it has to be thoughtful.

As the holiday season approaches, let us focus on meaningful, well-considered gifts that truly reflect our thoughts and feelings.

 Whether it is a present, a conversation, or a shared moment, what matters most is the intention behind it.

Be mindful, respectful, and honest in your interactions, and enjoy a festive season filled with joy and connection.

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