Youth Focus with Manners Msongelwa
YOUR mindset is a mental attitude that influences your thoughts, beliefs and behaviour. It can determine how you respond to challenges and opportunities. For example, a growth mindset is the belief that your abilities can be developed through hard work, while a fixed mindset is the belief that your abilities are innate.
Thoughts become things. This is a daily reminder that your thoughts create your reality.
There are things in life you can’t control e.g. the family you are born into, your complexion, your height, death of a loved one. These things happen whether you want to or not. But, there are many more things you can control.
You can control how you behave at school and at home. You can control your thoughts. These decisions are based on your thoughts and feelings about the events you are experiencing and that’s what creates your reality. Denying that is giving your power away.
How to think positively
Focus on the good things
Challenging situations and obstacles are a part of life. When you’re faced with one, focus on the good things no matter how small or seemingly insignificant they seem.
At school, always focus on what is good and try ignoring what you see as bad. Appreciate other students and always say good things when talking to them.
Open yourself up to humour
Studies have found that laughter lowers stress, anxiety and depression. It also improves coping skills, mood and self-esteem.
Be open to humour in all situations, especially the difficult ones and give yourself permission to laugh. It instantly lightens the mood and makes things seem a little less difficult.
Even if you’re not feeling it; pretending or forcing yourself to laugh can improve your mood and lower stress.
Spend time with positive people
Negativity and positivity have been shown to be contagious. Consider the people with whom you’re spending time.
Have you noticed how someone in a bad mood can bring down almost everyone in a room? A positive person has the opposite effect on others. This is common at school.
Being around positive people has been shown to improve self-esteem and increase your chances of reaching goals. Surround yourself with students who will lift you up and help you see the bright side.
Practice positive self-talk
We tend to be the hardest on ourselves and be our own worst critic. Over time, this can cause you to form a negative opinion of yourself that can be hard to shake.
To stop this, you’ll need to be mindful of the voice in your head and respond with positive messages, also known as positive self-talk.
The way you talk to yourself can influence your ability to regulate your feelings, thoughts and behaviour under stress.
Identify your areas of negativity
Take a good look at the different areas of your life and identify the ones in which you tend to be the most negative. Tackle one area at a time.
Start every day on a positive note
Create a ritual in which you start each day with something uplifting and positive. Here are a few ideas:
Tell yourself that it’s going to be a great day or any other positive affirmation.
Listen to a happy and positive song or playlist.
Share some positivity by giving a compliment or doing something nice for someone.
Dr Manners Msongelwa is an author, teacher and youth coach. He can be contacted on +263771019392