Online Reporter
Fadzayi Maposah-Correspondent
The holiday season is winding down, and today marks the first Saturday of 2025, Happy New Year!
Have you taken the time to reflect on your goals for the year ahead? Or are you part of the organised group that had resolutions set well before 2025, now merely fine-tuning them?
It is important to recognise how differently we approach this time of year.
Some of our friends and relatives belong to the “no resolutions” camp, echoing sentiments like, “been there, done that, and no more!”
I have learnt to respect everyone’s choices, shifting my focus from New Year’s resolutions to cultivating new habits that I strive to implement not just for the new year, but for life.
This journey is not just for personal gain but also for the benefit of those around me and for society at large.
As we step into 2025, I wish you all the best in your efforts to enhance your life. Remember, it is all about taking one step at a time.
As I reflect on this holiday season, I cannot help but think about the difficult decisions many people had to navigate. Decision-making is a nuanced process that requires careful consideration.
I once read that our lives are essentially the sum total of all the decisions we have ever made.
Some choices lead to healthier, more fulfilled lives, while others can have the opposite effect.
While some decisions are straightforward, others come with a web of complexities that can make them feel overwhelming. Importantly, our choices often have ripple effects, impacting those around us.
Consider the decision to move to a new town. Such a choice does not just affect the individual; the entire family is involved. Although the move may ultimately benefit the family, the initial adjustment can lead to friction as everyone adapts to a new home and environment.
Friends who were once just a short distance away can suddenly feel worlds apart.
I remember the bittersweet experience of moving homes during my childhood.
While we missed our friends, I was fortunate to reconnect with some of them through social media years later. However, it is never quite the same as maintaining those friendships in person.
I was lucky enough to encounter some of my primary school friends during my college years, which was an incredible experience.
For some, the holiday season serves as a homecoming event. Many people only return home at the end of the year, spending perhaps a month or six weeks with family before heading back to their lives elsewhere.
This homecoming is received differently by different people, and its effects can be varied. Imagine a relative who intermittently resurfaces, disappearing 11 months at a time.
Take aunt (tete) Mai Chipo, for example. Is it fair for her to work in South Africa, occasionally traveling to Mozambique and Botswana, while leaving Uncle ( bamukuru) baba Chipo to manage everything back home in Zimbabwe?
Uncle is responsible for ensuring the homestead is in order and that the family is well taken care of. Meanwhile, aunt provides financial support, often relying on money transfer services to ensure that school fees and family provisions are handled promptly. Over time, uncle has developed skills to manage the household in aunt’s absence.
On school visiting days, he organises snacks, travels to schools, attends meetings, and even makes video calls so that aunt can connect with the kids. I truly admire uncle for his dedication and the way he handles his responsibilities.
This situation leads me to ponder how couples like my aunt and uncle maintain their intimate relationships.
I understand that some may choose celibacy or abstain for various reasons, remaining faithful to their partners. However, I often wonder if anyone can truly claim to be 100 percent faithful. One thing is certain: the only control we have is over our own bodies.
I cannot fully hold myself accountable for my partner’s actions, especially when we are apart. While I do not have trust issues, this situation has been on my mind, particularly for couples like my aunt and uncle.
I believe that we should not leave everything to chance; where we can take action, we should.
The difficult decision for couples in such arrangements often revolves around intimacy.
This aspect of a relationship is complex and cannot be put on hold indefinitely. There is also the added question of whether to use protection or not.
If one partner suggests using protection, it may be perceived as an indication of infidelity.
I have encouraged my aunt and uncle to engage in open discussions without judgment.
Regardless of the financial support my uncle receives from aunt’s hard work, it cannot fulfil his emotional and physical needs.
Does aunt’s dedication to her job negate her own need for intimacy? Navigating these dynamics must be incredibly challenging. Difficult decisions are being made, and I look forward to exploring this further.
To be continued….
